Feeling stressed or overwhelmed? If you feel like you don’t have enough time to do everything you need to do, then you are saying yes to things you shouldn’t. We all have enough time to accomplish everything that we need to, so look over your list and see what you can say NO to.
Remember, you have time to do anything you actually need or want to do, just not EVERYTHING under the sun!
Brandi Hamrick
The “Queen B” Coach
www.thequeenbcoach.com
This is the second part of our 3 part series on how to make the most effective use of your past, present, and future so that you can live your best life and achieve your goals!!! If you need to catch up on the past, click here.
The present is the life that you are experiencing right now. The present is the shortest time span because it only lasts for a moment before it becomes the past, but it is the most important of all 3 time spans. It’s funny how that works, isn’t it? The tiniest range of time makes the biggest impact on your life. The choices you make right now, in the present, set the direction for the rest of your life.
In fact, the paragraph above is already a part of my past because I am typing this paragraph right now. If you are reading this, the entire article is now a part of my past because that means I have finished it and published it. The paragraph above is a part of your past because you are now reading this paragraph. This paragraph is your present because it’s what you are doing at this particular moment in time.
It’s true, the present only lasts for a second, and then it’s gone. The trick is to make decisions in these seconds that you have that set you up for success. Here are the best ways to use your present to your advantage:
1. The present affects your future.
If you choose to spend the present time stealing an automobile, you are likely affecting your future by being arrested, having to go to trial, and you will possibly give up several years of your life in prison. If you choose to lay around on the couch too much and not exercise you are affecting your future by gaining weight and not being healthy (notice I say lay around too much, go ahead and relax sometime!).
Likewise, if you choose to use the present time you are given to make good decisions you will be in a better place in the future than you are right now.
Ask yourself: “How does what I am doing right now affect my future?” If it isn’t helping you, it’s hurting you, so choose something else!
2. The Present is Real
The present is the only real, actual time that you have. You can’t go back in time, and you can’t predict the future (you can help the future, but not predict it). You can control what you do right now though.
3. Be in the moment.
Even though the present is the most important time frame, it is the most neglected.
People usually do one of 2 things:
1. They think to much about the past or
2. They think or worry too much about the future.
If you think too much about the past you aren’t using your time and resources effectively now, in the present. You are also letting your past define you and control you. Likewise, if you are constantly worrying about the future (what if this and what if that) you aren’t using the time you have to plan for the future.
Using your time in the present to plan for the future is smart, using your time to dream about the future without planning is not. You can’t spend all your time dreaming and visioning without backing those visions and dreams up with solid, concrete actions. Otherwise all of your time will be spent dreaming for a future that never comes.
4. Live in the moment.
Live in the moment by enjoying the time and life that you have right now. When you find yourself dwelling too much about the past or worrying too much about the future, simply come back to the present moment. Take a few deep breaths and concentrate on simply being in the present for a few moments. Next ask yourself, “what can I do right now to best positively influence my life?”
Remember, the present is powerful because if you don’t like your past you can change. Start making different decisions and creating new habits that support your goals. We all have the same amount of time given to us, no one has more or less than you.
Brandi Hamrick
The “Queen B” Coach
www.thequeenbcoach.com
Too busy to exercise?
New studies have shown that small bursts of exercise throughout the day have similar benefits to working out for longer all at once.
A brisk 10-minute walk after rising, another at lunch, and one after dinner can give you health benefits without compromising your schedule! Add a few lunges and squats while talking on the phone or watching TV and you will be fit in a flash!
Brandi Hamrick
“The Queen B Coach”
www.thequeenbcoach.com
www.yougrowgirl.net
Brandi Hamrick is a lifestyle expert and success coach who empowers women to go from “busy bee” to “Queen B” of their lives and businesses so they can grow into the person they are meant to B!
Today we begin the first article in a 3-part series about your past, present, and future. We will start this week with the past, and over the next few weeks talk about the present and future and how to use them to your advantage so that you can achieve all your goals and live your best life!
The point of this series is to make the best use of all 3 time frames so that you can effectively use your time.
Throughout this series, keep this in mind: You should learn from your past, but not dwell on it. You should be in the moment, but not live for the moment; and you should plan and dream for your future, but your happiness should not depend on it.
Ideally, you want to balance your past, present, and future. You need to learn from your past so that you can grow and avoid making mistakes. You need to use the present in order to create the future that you desire. The problem is that the majority of people don’t use the present to their advantage. They are either spending too much time dwelling on their past, which holds them back, or they are visioning about the future without being content in the present or taking any steps to turn those dreams into reality. Today we will cover the past, next week we will talk about the present (our only true reality), and finally, we will cover the future so that you can effectively use your time today to get where you want tomorrow.
The past
Your past is important because it has shaped you into the person you are today and has given you the experiences you need to become the person you are intended to be.
Here are 3 Ways to Use the Past to Your Advantage:
1. Don’t Dwell on the Past
The problem with the past is that if you think about what could have been or should have been, you are subconsciously victimizing yourself and inhibiting your growth for the future.
Notice I said that you are subconsciously victimizing yourself, not that you are playing the role of the victim. There is a big difference. If you spend time and energy thinking about how your life would be different if you hadn’t divorced, if your child didn’t make certain choices, if you came from a different background, if you weren’t sick, if you had chosen to go to college or picked a different career, you are only hurting yourself. Here’s why:
If you choose to speak (or even think) about “what if” you are sending a huge, red, strong, powerful signal out to God, the universe, yourself, and everyone else around you that you are lacking. You should just paint a sign and wear it around your neck that says: “I do not have the resources to be the person I want to be and I am not ready to live out my desired life.” You are essentially saying that you do not have enough. You don’t have the experience, wisdom, creativity, time, or other resources to accomplish your dreams. You will be stuck where you are and you will get nowhere.
If, on the other hand, you learn from your past, but don’t dwell on it, you are sending out signals that you are exactly who you are intended to be and that you are ready to live out your purpose.
I believe that God places desires in our hearts for a reason and that if you can think it you can create it. I also believe that we all are given the same resources and opportunities (though we may not take them). If you don’t believe this, then you are putting yourself beneath others and inhibiting your own growth. You are saying that you aren’t as smart, capable, or resourceful as someone else. No one is smarter than you, no one is better than you, and no one has more time than you. We all have 24 hours in the day, we just use them differently.
Your life throws you the experiences and obstacles that you need to live your purpose. If you watched the movie “Slumdog Millionaire” you know that the main character had not been properly educated and had grown up in extreme poverty with no parents. He was able to answer all the questions correctly to win the million dollars because of all the trials and experiences he had. It was his destiny to do so. But, what if he was out making really poor decisions with his life and dwelling on the fact he had a tumultuous childhood? He wouldn’t have taken (or even known of) the opportunity to be on the game show.
Maybe one day we will all have time machines so that we can go back and see if certain things would have affected the outcome of our lives, or so that we can visit different dimensions (where anything that is a possibility happens). Okay, enough with the quantum physics. The reality is that we can’t go back. Maybe things would have turned out better for you and maybe they wouldn’t have…or maybe they would have been worse.
What’s more, “what iffing” is a huge waste of time. If you are using the time you have in the present to think about what shoulda-coulda-woulda been then you are not using your time effectively to get to where you are supposed to be (if ifs and buts were candy and nuts, we’d all have a Merry Christmas, right?). It also brings back those same negative feelings from the past. Bottom line: shoulda-coulda-woulda isn’t productive and doesn’t serve you in any way, shape or form.
Imagine for a moment that you are on a road trip. The trip is supposed to take 2 hours and you are currently at 1.5 hours. Suddenly you realize that you aren’t on the right road. You missed the turn you were supposed to take 30 minutes back. Now, you will have to drive 30 minutes until you reach the road and then you will still be 1 hour from your final destination. You are 1.5 hours away when you should be only 30 minutes away. What do you do? Do you waste time pointing to the spot on the map that you “should” be at by now? Do you let yourself get upset about this mistake, or beat yourself up about it? Does it serve you to obsess over the fact you aren’t as far along as you would have liked? Will it get you to your final destination any faster? Or, perhaps you will take a moment to pull over and look at your map to see what the best possible route is from where you are right now.
2. Learn From the Past
Learn from your past. Learn from all those mistakes and experiences so that you don’t waste time repeating them and so that you can help the world become a better place. Learn from other peoples’ mistakes while you are at it.
We all can think of someone who keeps making the same mistakes over and over. Maybe they keep going back to a bad relationship or choosing an abusive partner, or maybe they can’t learn from their career mistakes. Whatever it is, we should all learn from our past.
Our past serves us best when we can learn from it and make the best possible choices for today.
3. Don’t Live in the Past
Are your best years behind you? I can remember graduating from high school and hearing someone say they were so depressed because they just knew that was going to be the best time of their life and it was over. I can remember thinking, “the best part of your life is over…at 18?!” Don’t get me wrong, I liked high school and made some good friends, but I was looking forward to the future and I sure as heck wasn’t going to defeat myself by saying the best days of my life were over.
The truth is, that person probably did have his best days in high school. Not because he couldn’t have gone on to live a great life, but because he told himself over and over that those were his best years. No matter your age and stage in life, know that your best days aren’t over. They have yet to come.
You may have anticipated getting married and raising kids your entire life. Maybe your marriage is over and/or your kids are grown. Maybe you feel like your best days were in high school, college, or your childhood. Set new goals. Achieve new things and challenge yourself.
4. Forgive
Forgive those who have wronged you. I don’t mean have lunch with them, see them, or even call them. I just mean to forgive them in your heart. You don’t have to like everybody. There are people in life that you just don’t get along with and are best to stay away from. But, holding a grudge is like carrying that person around on your back every second of everyday. You can never escape from them. Forgive those who have wronged you in your own heart and immediately lighten your load.
Brandi Hamrick,
“The Queen B Coach”
www.thequeenbcoach.com
Brandi Hamrick is a lifestyle expert and success coach who helps women go from “busy bee” to “Queen B” of their lives and businesses so they can grow into who they are meant to B!
Whether you have a significant other or not this year, you need to remember your best and most trusted Valentine of all: yourself!
You are strong, smart, and are always there for yourself. The hands, brain, soul, and body you have can accomplish great things in your lifetime.
Do yourself a favor this V-day and buy yourself something special, treat yourself to a spa day, watch your favorite movie, or vow to start achieving other health or personal goals. Also take a few minutes to write down all of your accomplishments and the reasons you love yourself!
Much Love,
Brandi Hamrick
“The Queen B Coach”
www.thequeenbcoach.com
If you want to achieve big things, you need to play big and think even bigger!
1. Brainstorm Big!
Hopefully you have a notepad or journal where you brainstorm and write down all of your brilliant ideas. This is a great first step in playing big, but why stop at just a small notebook? Why not use a huge drawing pad to record your ideas? Get a large artist or easel pad to brainstorm. Also get really big, fat markers to go with them. Start writing all of your “big” ideas on “big” paper! If you have a blank wall in your office, you can also use it to stick all of your creations on for inspiration. This can also be helpful when writing a book or doing anything in sequence because you can arrange your papers and notes in the order you like.
2. Vision Big!
Once you have brainstormed, sit with your ideas for a few days to figure out if they are really something you want. If the answer is yes, vision yourself in the best possible outcome imaginable. No small finishes here, I mean think really big! Once you have the biggest and best outcome pinpointed, start from the finish line and think backward to outline the necessary steps needed to achieve this goal. For instance, if you want to write a book, you may have envisioned being a best-selling author on Oprah. Start with the end goal in mind and think of as many steps as you can in between Oprah and where you are right now.
3. Get Moving!
Once you know what you want, start with the first steps needed to achieve your goal. If you want to write a book, set aside even just 2 hours a week to write. Also set goals for how many typed pages you will finish in that 2-hour period. You will be surprised at the progress you will make simply by getting started. Then you will be well on your way to having that best seller in no-time! The important thing is that you start taking even small steps today to achieve those big goals for the future.
Achieving your goals can be as easy as 1-2-3 when you are thinking BIG!
Brandi Hamrick
“The Queen B Coach”
www.thequeenbcoach.com
Schedule “Pillow Princess” days into your calendar every month or so.
A “Pillow Princess” day is a day just for you. No kids, no significant other, no friends. Just you, relaxing, resting, or doing whatever else you want ALONE so that you can clear your mind and de-stress.
If you can’t get the house to yourself, go see a movie, go to the spa, have lunch, exercise, or rent a hotel room. No phones, no internet, no e-mail.
Do a favorite activity or pile up in bed with a movie or book (nonfiction). Just be sure not to watch or read anything stressful or that makes you think too much. I am all for learning, but this day is to relax your brain. No hard thinking.
Consider taking a day off if you are able so you can be alone in your home while others are at work and school.
Give a “PILLOW PRINCESS” day a try, chances are you will want to make it part of your permanent routine!
Brandi Hamrick
The “Queen B” Coach
www.thequeenbcoach.com
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” –Marianne Williamson
This ultra-powerful and inspirational quote is one of my favorites because it is so true.
What is it that you want to do in life? What are your biggest dreams? These things have probably been your deepest desires since you were a child and are a part of your core. They are who you are, they are your being. God gives you desires and dreams that are absolutely achievable and positively you.
The fear of failure is only the surface fear of achieving your dreams. What lies beneath is the fear of the truth that you could absolutely live out your greatest desires. But… what then? What if you succeeded? Could you handle all that responsibility? What if people looked up to you and you were a role model? What then? Could you handle the pressure?
You can handle anything that comes your way. You are a strong, confident, brilliant human being with the ability to think, create, and live the life of your dreams. You are not at a disadvantage. No one is better than you or has more power than you, we are created equal. Nothing is different between someone who achieves their goals and someone who doesn’t accept the achiever took opportunities that came their way. We are all given opportunities needed to live the life of our dreams. What are you waiting for? Accept the power within you and decide to step out of your comfort zone and take the opportunities that come your way.
Brandi Hamrick
“The Queen B Coach”
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Brandi Hamrick: coach, entrepreneur, and personal development expert.
